3N Speaks

Forgive me for they have sinned

January 30, 2008 · 30 Comments

I have seen things

Major shit like Britney’s Umbrella attack on a car windshield looking like every part like the iconic poster child for white trash turned rich turned weird and pathetic.

Or Alicia Keys in tight gear shooting down bad guys (Smoking Aces) and looking every part like the sexy mama that she is – but that is neither here nor there…

****

Have you ever found yourself repenting on behalf of another sinner while you watch cautiously as he/she/they continue to sin?

If you haven’t then please clear your schedule on a Wednesday night and plan on staying late for the midnight show at….

LIDDOS

Holy Shit!

I always thought I had seen enough not to be shocked, I could not have been more wrong.

A few minutes into the aforementioned Midnight Show all I could do was shake my head, alert my soul that there was nothing to be recorded here and start praying.

“Are they fucking serious; or just fucking seriously…what in the world world is this?”…I posed the rhetorical question to no one.

Not to mention I was still recovering from an earlier episode of a jamaa shamelessly getting a BJ from one of the many strippers right in front of other patrons.

I had looked away from the BJ spectacle only for a person in my crew shockingly asking….”did that guy….or are did the waiter just spill a pina colada drink?”

Disgusting as it sounds but true — spoof — right in front of everyone, four meters away from our table at most!

Liddos, my friends Liddos!

****

I do intend to one day share an easy Sunday afternoon with the likes of Mother Theresa and Mahtma Ghandhi huko juu mbinguni thus I have imposed on myself a Liddos Lifetime ban.

Ukiniona huko tena just jua I have been dragged and drugged.

p.s.

Is it illegal to tip strippers in Kenya? It seemed to me that patrons were a bit hesitant with the tipping but surprisingly the entertainers kept doing their thing…

Beats me really, why would anyone strip with no tips? Are they on salary, medical insurance, retirement plans?

Categories: the lord and i

30 responses so far ↓

  • aegeus // January 31, 2008 at 12:48 am | Reply

    midnight show, eigh?

  • acolyte // January 31, 2008 at 1:11 am | Reply

    Now that is one thing I have to see as soon as I get back to Kenya. Now as for tipping the mamas, we all know that Kenyans are cheap bastards who want a free show above all else.
    I do think those chics must be paid well and look at it this way, they must make a lot of extra cash from giving oral services.
    My what is Kenya coming to?

  • Half n Half // January 31, 2008 at 2:35 am | Reply

    My mouth was agape for like many many minutes until I started writing this comment. Are you sure? really?

  • Kirima // January 31, 2008 at 8:23 am | Reply

    Is that for real? But nothing suprises me anymore.

  • bryjoe // January 31, 2008 at 9:15 am | Reply

    went toonce liddos and was really amazed kwanza they(strippers)walked around table to table asking for people who wanted to be pleasured orally or “otherwise”.
    lets just say if my boyfie starts frequenting hukos he’s out in the cold

  • archer // January 31, 2008 at 11:39 am | Reply

    Uliona maajabu, eh? Hehe! The strippers at Liddos & Apple Bees aren’t paid well. Kenya hasn’t got to that level where stripping is considered a professional job. About the tips, if a lap dance goes for 150 to 200 bob, would you tip her 100 bob, or would you add 50 bob and get a 2nd lap dance or a beer?

    Only an idiot with a death wish would get a BJ from a stripper or shag one.

    Embarrassing moment at Liddos: I once met my boy’s dad there on Wednesday night, getting a lap dance. What to do?

  • Xs // January 31, 2008 at 11:47 am | Reply

    Ati Kii? My mental pix of that place are already corrupt! Ngai fafa!

    anything that corrupts Xs mind needs not another look

  • modoathii // January 31, 2008 at 12:19 pm | Reply

    sisemi kitu!

    no, let me just say, they need training on how to do this s**t.

    haiya, sisemi kitu.

    wewe, one more sentence utatoboa kila your storos at said place. i bet you were dragged there…LOL

  • ashamed // January 31, 2008 at 1:13 pm | Reply

    yeah i understand completely…a couple of weeks ago my pals and i went to applebees..to check out that hype…didnt want to get left during storytime!we went we saw and we conquered!…..

    since that weekend any stranger that stares at my general direction leaves me wondering if he/she witnessed the conquering!

    many have witnessed but few have conquered. only the immoral at heart can conquer. can you imagine these places have frequenters…i don’t get it.

  • Gishungwa // January 31, 2008 at 7:43 pm | Reply

    I shall not say anything besides Ahem! But the morals have gone to the dogs.

    do tell please….

  • threetypesofcrazy // January 31, 2008 at 11:54 pm | Reply

    wait, I have a complaint- why use the name applebess for starters? can they find another name. tht is my niece’s favourite restuarnt in Florida- now I need to let her know she has to be careful where she mentions that name. Her parents can get arrested.

    hata mimi that one jaazed me, i will tell you this though there are hungry people there — but not for food

    I hope when you prayed, it was for the strippers you prayed for. I do not think that anyone has that plan when growing up- I think life situations can put people in places- hard places.
    But I have to ask, kwani having sex in public is legal?Public property and all that!!!!!!!!!!!

    i was praying for the strippers, the patrons, ceiling, thongs, everyone and everything in that place needed forgiveness. i think its not legal but that sure didn’t seem to stop the activities

  • threetypesofcrazy // January 31, 2008 at 11:54 pm | Reply

    p.s. welcome back to posting.

    good to be back

  • Maua // February 1, 2008 at 1:01 am | Reply

    If I ever catch Mr Maua in them places, It’ll be nil by mouth, and divorce. No warning.

    Praying for his forgiveness will be out of question.

    i pray that either Mr Maua never goes to them places or he is never caught, LOL

  • bomseh // February 4, 2008 at 4:06 pm | Reply

    @Archer – tight situation. Ati boy’s dad. I would just say hi to him then I’ll be getting free booze everytime we meet, for life, or else…

    definitely free pints, find out his local and hit him up every so often

  • kip // February 8, 2008 at 12:17 am | Reply

    haii i never thought of going to those strip clubs though i heard about one called apple bees.

    pia apple bees i somehow was dragged there, same story as the others but at least apple bees has a bit of class.

  • udi // February 11, 2008 at 3:52 pm | Reply

    LMAO. Wachana with those joints. U need to know where the undercover ones are.

    Udi, you are playing now…ati other joints with better entertainment? Now i know for sure hell won’t be empty!

  • tombanner // February 11, 2008 at 3:55 pm | Reply

    I DIDN’T FIND LIDDOS THAT [S]EXPLICIT AS DESCRIBED HERE. IN FACT I THOUGHT IT WAS LESS EXCITING THAN APPLEBEES! APPLEBEES U CAN SEE EVERYTHIN N EVEN TOUCH. LIDDOS’ VERY LITTLE ACTION UNLESS THEY’VE CHANGED NOW N DAT WAS THREE WEEKS AGO, TA!

    I must have gone on a special day coz the stuff I saw was too much for me

  • tombanner // February 12, 2008 at 4:32 am | Reply

    HI, I NEED 2 GO ON SUCH A DAY, PERHAPS VALE NITE MAY DO. I WAS THERE 3 WEEKS AGO BUT IT WAS DULL N SO I LEFT SHORTLY B4 1 AM N HEADED 2 APPLEBEES WHERE I STAYED TILL DUSK. I WANT 2 SEE SIMILAR HOT AXION SUCH AS DA BJ U SAW. I ACN GO HYSTERICAL IN SUCH STATES! I HEAR CHILLERS’ MUCH HOTTER WITH LIVE XXX AXION, HAVEN’T PROVED BUT WILL TRY IT OUT. SO DID U GO THERE ON A WEDNSDAY OR A WEEKEND? I’M REALLY INTERESTD PERHAPS IT WUD AROUSE THE VOYEUR IN ME, TA!

    tombanner, you are really looking for this places. i hear there are mob undercover joints (udi) with a lot more explicit action than the likes of Liddos, Apple Bees, Chillers etc. good luck

  • tombanner // February 13, 2008 at 9:30 am | Reply

    Now,@UDIS Y DON U SHED MORE LIGHT ON DE UNDERCOVERS N OTHER CRAZIER PLACES. I’M STARVING. HOLLA @ tombanner79@yahoo.com. Thanx.

  • james // February 25, 2008 at 8:40 am | Reply

    kindly am really starved of sex can some one tell me where i can get those old mamas who needs jamaas to fuck them seriously.or if ure a lady n u need sex seriously kindly write me afrobuff19@yahoo.com

  • Reginah // March 10, 2008 at 10:51 am | Reply

    HI james, write me @ regnagalgalo@yahoo.com. Am 36, n starved, but am especially lookin 4 some steamy boy with a large cock!

  • tombanner // March 10, 2008 at 10:55 am | Reply

    Wow, there,s a ramshackle club on Riveroad called Tahiti…it’s wild n dem gals can do incredible things 2 u. But I can.t imagine maself lickin a stripper’s cunt!

  • kihika // April 2, 2008 at 5:35 am | Reply

    u guys be serious dont u have things to do positive?

  • ricardo // May 19, 2008 at 6:53 am | Reply

    hi am really looking for any old woman out there who needs good sex am young 26yrs old and ready to lick your clitoris and fuck u well kindly write to me and will get back to you ricardomathews@yahoo.com am a resident of nairobi kilimani.my weakness is i have a big dick and if u cant handle please dont bother to reach me bye

  • Random Kenyan // June 4, 2008 at 5:33 am | Reply

    Ok, whats going on here!!!

    don’t know but it seems kenyans are in need…

  • Mo Ma // June 4, 2008 at 7:37 am | Reply

    LOL, your blog has become the new craigslist or something? Hookups left and right. :D D

    i don’t know why this post keeps getting people trying to hook up for sex…I keep deleting comments mpaka now I am bore

    d

  • Peter // October 21, 2008 at 4:05 am | Reply

    Interesting post.
    But whats with these crazy comments? Kwani watu wako na ukame aje?
    Damn!

  • u all so back dated! // February 24, 2009 at 5:26 pm | Reply

    kenyan strip clubs r so uncul n their unpro dancers r more of prostitutes!kwani u guys have neva heard of HYPNOTIC WILDCATS?! its a high clas exotic agency were u can hire proffesional strippers n models 4 private shows or events!th strippers cum with their own sexy strip gear n th best part of al is tht u can actually choose th strippers frm the agency mag n th costume u want thm to appear on! 4gt th liddos n applebees shit HYPNOTIC WILDCATS rock n rule!

  • Rony // October 30, 2009 at 4:39 pm | Reply

    Apple biz iz a lil bit shagy tho i lvd da stripers…thy smell nyc n can rly get u horny.go thea wen ppl r less nd ul lv it…bt ur wallet talks

  • Anonymous // November 7, 2009 at 9:10 am | Reply

    starved sexually please mamas in need get me @ mwenej@yahoo.com

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