Live like it’s your last day….

Lucky for most of us we will not know our last day until we are in heaven looking back, laughing and wondering what we would have done different. And if you make it to hell, well, let’s just say you will have other burning issues to attend to.

We often hear people say…’I live my life like it’s my last day’ a pure bullshit statement if you ask me. But isn’t it good to ponder what one would do or not do…here is my list as of now.

Repent: quite obvious the most urgent action item of the day, I would also mention that I repent for sins I might commit later during the way.

No Work Obviously:

3N: hey Mr. Boss Man, you know what I just called to say I won’t be able to come in tomorrow (laughing out loud in the background)

Boss Man: Why 3N? Are you sick or mtoto is sick again for the zillionth time?

3N: No Mr. Boss man, I am calling in Dead!

Boss Man: What do you mean, stop playing around, I am busy.

3N: I know you never believe me but just read the obituaries next Tuesday, and tell me if I am a liar.

Boss Man: I am hanging up and writing you up, stop playing around.

3N: Peace out, Nigga!

Sleepless on Earth: Why would anyone even think of sleeping when you have a lifetime on the other side to do it?

Horizontal Connections: At least several hours of uninterrupted matters of the body. Make love as if you want to imprint yourself into each inch of her body. Of course you might have to you the ‘it’s my last wish on this earth, dear’ card for her to live work and so on.

Money Mayhem: I would withdraw all the money then go to a busy street and make it rain from one of the top floors. Before then I would have updated my life policy to the maximum payout for my loved one to jienjoy after me gone.

last but not least

Loved Ones: bid them goodbye and them give them a freak request…like when I die please stay awake holding hands for 248 minutes between Friday 12:00 am and Saturday 12:00 pm, just fuck with em for my heavenly pleasure.

Or ‘I want all of you to count in unison 1 to 10 backwards four times without repeating any number twice, in French.

And then request this song by the great poet Tupac Shakur.

Bury me smilin’
with G’s in my pocket
have a party at my funeral
let every rapper rock it
let tha hoes that I usta know
from way before
kiss me from my head to my toe
give me a paper and a pen
so I can write about my life of sin
a couple bottles of Gin
incase I don’t get in
tell all my people i’m a Ridah
nobody cries when we die

I think that’s what I would do.

For now it’s Furahiday and there are several shotoz calling my name. good weekend everyone, don’t die…kidding.

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7 thoughts on “Live like it’s your last day….

  1. ah, matters of life and death- inspiration to make my list. I have had morbid moments, but haven’t thought too much about what I’d do. write a will?

    writing a will is giving in, LOL. but i don’t do it coz of morbid moments just food for thought…engaging the matter up there.

  2. Yes this is calling to check that list but that call to your boss is hilarious..

    i think a serious list would be much longer and boring

  3. eeerrrr how do you know you will be sleeping on the other side?If youare in heaven- you might be taking the elephants to graze- now you can’t do that alseep and if you are in hell? well, can you sleep through a fire and you are the roast?
    When does the alarm clock go off when you are on the other side? For one to wake up?

  4. The money bit i hear you totally, i would make sure my account has only minimum balance. Wait, i am already doing that.
    Horizontal connections, damn the train.
    Nice list.

  5. LOL! i don’t plan on any list, nataka kuenda tu. i’m already doing everything right now, i think.

    but hmmm, what would i do? most probably i’d end up dead before the official time runs out. becoz whatever i’d do yaani…..

    3TOC? ni wewe tu…LOL!

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