A man’s right to choose

Men do not have a right to choose whether a woman they have impregnated aborts or carries the pregancy to full term.

Can’t a man then argue that they will not provide financial, moral or social support for the child if they had insisted on an abortion but the woman denied them that privilege on the basis that SHE was the one who was pregnant and thus the decision solely hers?

Why should an individual decision bear mutual responsibility?

27 thoughts on “A man’s right to choose

  1. Shhh!!!!!
    Abortion is the woman’s decision, support(financial,moral,etc) is the man’s responsibility. Facts that cannot change.

    Carol I am trying to think of what is the opposite of male chauvinism because your statement represents the polar opposite. How can it be a fact when equality is a key agenda in women’s rights? Why should responsibility fall on the person who had no choice in the outcome?

  2. 3N Speaks…out of the diab this time, why lie. First of all, when a man can carry a pregnancy to full term, then he can demand equal rights. As it is, men carry power rights, they hold the jobs, they get to keep them when women get pregnant – so dont even go there!
    Then, a man saying have an abortion takes no risk but to speak his mind – she says its her body, because it is her uterus that the abortion will affect – whether she decides to keep the baby or not.
    It is arguments like these that promote the ‘abscondita’ nature of some men, because the law is clear, you shoot – you bear responsibility, whether you like it or not.

    Do not misunderstand my question, I do not want men to have a right to choose if a woman aborts or not…I want them to be exempt from the responsibility that comes out of that decision!

  3. I normally say, the decision to bear or not to bear a child rests solely with the woman. If the big guy wanted men to have a say in this, he woulda given then 1 swimming creature per month.

    If a woman chooses to keep the baby, then the man is cooked. He shoulda thought twice before doing it. There’s no way he can abscond responsibility for something he helped create.

    Double standards, I know, but hey, who said life is fair?
    If you don’t want to bear the responsibility, then don’t do any actions that could lead to it.

    at least you admit it’s double standards.

  4. I think that there should be a pre-birthing form where one can say that if a lady decides that she is keeping the child against the guy’s wishes, the man should not be bound to provide unless he so wishes.


  5. To keep or not to is a decision that the couple should decide together. This is a tricky situation but terms should be agreed.


  6. A man’s right to choose begins and ends with whether to put on a condom or not. The consequences that come from that choice up to and including a child have to be dealt with.

    and dealt with fairly – from whether to keep the child to taking responsibility of that decision.

  7. I happen to be a feminist, yes I am. Equality means being heard and not being seen and not vice versa.
    All a woman needs in this case is support, whether to abort or not, I still say its up to her to decide under no pressure, the whole thing happens in and with her body.

    it will always but up to the woman, what I am asking is if she decided against the wishes of the man – should the man be responsible nevertheless?

  8. Yes, you’re right to some extent, a man has the right to choose. The right to choose whether to get the woman pregnant or not. But once that part is done then I’m afraid sir that your choices are quite limited.

    Because you see, no matter how you look at it, the weight of the abortion is carried by the woman. The vacuum goes into her not him, if anyone bleeds to death it will be her not him, the strongest psychological trauma affects her not him, so kindly pardon the female species if we decide to take that particular desicion in our own hands.

    Yes, you can then go ahead and deny the responsibility of raising a baby, no problem. But what kind of man does that make you? One who made a choice to get a lady pregnant and then sharked on that responsibility when things got too thick and even went to the extent of suggesting a procedure that could lead said lady and said baby both to the grave? But then again, as you said, it’s the man’s prerogative….

    Slap a sticker on me that says feminist but that’s just my two cents.

  9. 3N…talk about walking into a bitch slap….

    My two cents. Ladies, let’s not apply selective amnesia here on matters of equality in decision making. Having your cake and eating it will not redress the short changing that mankind has unleashed on women for time immemorial.

    Responsibility for conceiving is not solely a man’s responsibility. It’s your job to make sure you don’t conceive if you don’t plan to get pregnant, regardless of the man’s decision to put on a condom or not. Your uterus – your responsibility to screen what goes in it.

    (Can I qualify here by saying that normal circumstances of a relationship apply here and that I’m assuming both parties are consenting adults of sound mind)

    When we get to the stage of having to make a choice about termination – then both of you have a responsibility of sorts – and not necessarily the same ones.

    If you don’t want to have such a dilemma – guys, don’t even think about having unprotected sex and ejaculating in a woman who you would never consider to be the mother of your child. Ladies, take care of your shit and stop depending on that shady battered condom that’s been in his wallet for I don’t know how long.

    Getting into brinkmanship and having a tussle between a father to be who wants nothing to do with a child and a mother to be who is worried that if she aborts things will go pear shaped for her is just retarded selfishness from both parties. No one comes out of this one righteous and smelling of roses

  10. Interesting read or hear the arguments by both sides.. Seriously men cannot win on this one regardless on how persuasive or powerful we are. Simple, ladies it is your decision when come to this one and you better exercise it responsibly

  11. Men just need to wear condoms and this will not be an issue!

    if i was a chic i wouldn’t peg my not getting pregnant on a man being responsible.

  12. Serious issue this one. I believe in equality of both men and women. Both parents should make the decision on whether to keep the child or not. I think it is thoroughly wrong for a woman to abort a child whose father is willing to support. But all the same she carries it; she can even say it was a false alarm!

  13. The whole effort here is to find some way to make the guilt of fornication less pesky since the whole debate centers on the assumption of unmarried individuals doing what should only be done by married couples. Since marriage = man accepting responsibility for the priviledge of propagating the real question is why no one so far has been bold enough to champion marriage as the solution to the responsibility question.

  14. Put it another way, msee kama u haf issues with ur chick refusing to abort ur kid and then making u financially responsible for raising the kid…. (a) keep ur reproductive juices to urself. ….(b) only sleep with ur wife.

  15. How about this, if a child is conceived then:
    1. Legally mandate the woman to inform or to make an adequte attempt to inform the man of the child with in a set period of time.
    2. Upon notification the man has a limited amount of time to declare to the court and to the woman his intent.
    3. The woman then makes her decision with full knowledge of all factors.

    The time constraints all need to be within the legal abortion range.

    This way the man has second choice; responsibility or not, Just as woman has her right to choose; abortion or life.

  16. @Jamaa mwingine

    while I agree with you that Marriage is optimal, we do not live in a perfect world and must therefore have laws for the world we do live in.

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